I know the disease imagery has been way too overused, but this is how I feel about my attitude towards food.

I worry about it 24/7. Til the word 'worry' has become but a euphemism. It consumes my every being. (Pun fully intended). It incapacitates me and renders me incapable of doing much else when I'm worrying.

It's an obsession. I let it become one, and now it's a cycle I can't break out of. I feel so trapped. I'm able to step outside of myself and see how much damage I'm doing to myself mentally but it's become so that I cannot help myself anymore, I can't tell myself "Stop, you're taking this too far." It's nothing but worry worry worry.

So much imagery, but none an exaggeration. I want to be happy with my weight and my body, but everytime I step on the scale, or look at myself in the mirror, all I see is imperfection and worse than that, sheer ugliness.