I've been hit by momentary bouts of terrorism paranoia of late. Too close for comfort, so much unnecessary death and violence in the world. The people caught in the Bali blast could easily have been you or me.

I think Singaporeans are still largely unaware of just how dangerous this looming threat is. If you happened to be caught in a bomb blast, your life would be over in a fraction of a second. The paper chase, the hankering for the better pay/job/car/house won't matter anymore. If it happens, the government won't be able to protect you for that fraction of a second between life and death.

It truly boggles the (my) mind how my worrying vacillates between mundane inanities like handing up that assignment on time, trying to lose weight and dying. It really bothers me that in the fraction of a second just before I die, I could be worrying about something REALLY stupid like "I shouldn't have eaten the ice-cream just now, I'll have to go figure out a way to burn it off." Or with my last breath, I think "Gee, I could have done better in that last philosophy assignment."

Alright, alright. I swear, I didn't mean to make it sound so macabre, or make light anyone's suffering for that matter. I'm just trying to relieve myself of the burden of worrying when some maniac's going to blow something up in my face the moment I step out of the comfort of my house.

*

I have this really bad habit of playing with the rubberbands in my mouth with my tongue. Especially the one that goes diagonally across. I can make little 'tic tic' sounds, it's almost like having my own little harp. In my mouth. Don't try imagining it or anything. I do it almost unconsciously most of the time, though I realise that it may freak/gross some people out. I will make an effort to curb this disgusting habit.

Have sudden urge to bake something. Muffins. I haven't baked muffins before.

Oh shuddup and wipe that silly grin off your face. I can bake. And even cook a little. I make mean scrambled eggs. At least, I like the taste of my own scrambled eggs better than anyone else's. Hah! Now just beg me to make you some and I just might relent.

I'm feeling all virtuous now and have made plans for a new diet that starts tomorrow. No crashes, no unrealistic restrictions. But am slowly going to cut carbs out of my diet. I plan to go carb-free for one meal a day, either lunch or dinner. It's going to be tough because I CRAVE carbs half hour before lunch. I wish Subway opened more outlets around Singapore so I could have their salad with relatively fat-free turkey breast slices. I'm also going to have to find some way to stop craving for carbs around tea time because I'm cutting it out of lunch but we'll see.