Aw, another one of those really great sites bites the dust.

Think one of my ex-jc classmates is anorexic. Met up with her today like most Mondays, she told me that she was upset because she put on 1 kilo. Now, I'm not exceptionally close to her, but I suppose, close enough. At least, for me to probe in what I hope was the least intrusive manner possible. I'm aware that she's been eating nothing but raw vegetables and fruits for the past 5 months or so, and she's lost about 7 kilos since then. Mind you, she was not fat before, far from it. She told me that she hasn't been eating lately partly because of the 1 kilo gain, partly because she's too busy studying. She didn't have lunch today despite my gentle coaxing. I told her in (again, what I hope was an indirect manner) that she seems to be displaying signs of anorexia. I can't be sure, of course, but I'm still worried anyhow. And there's really only so much I can do as a friend, I guess I consider us on slightly-better-than-classmates terms.

I can empathise with her, and yes, with you, as well. We seem to have had similiar experiences to some degree. i.e., getting positive, affirming remarks from people when we lose weight visibly (which in turn makes us become even more obsessive about losing weight), getting extremely upset when we put on even a kilo, having to deal with counter-productive remarks like "You're not fat, what!" which don't make us feel the least bit better about ourselves.

And to think that eating disorders are no longer isolated cases. Anorexia is no longer regarded as that "obscure" mental disease that Karen Carpenter died from. It's a cry for help, a cry I feel goes largely unheard. And the sufferers themselves will not approach anyone for help on their own accord because they can't deal with the shame that comes along with it. The self-destruction only worsens as a result, and will become harder to cure over time. This isn't something you can pull yourself out of, it isn't one of those manic-depressive episodes that you get as an adolescent that you know you'll get out of eventually.

The sheer number of people suffering from EDs should act as a wake-up call but it doesn't. The people around them don't take notie but instead choose to brush it off as paranoia as they roll their eyes.

Why am I getting so affected, you ask? Admittedly, I don't have an ED, and the only thing that's stopping me from sliding into one (most likely binge eating) is that I know how hard it'll be for me to get out of that cycle, so it's not so much the ED I'm afraid of developing, it's the recovery. The recovery that's going to be marred and made harder by periods of self-doubt and self-loathing, or even worse, giving up.

And thank you for your well-wishes. Am feeling much better already. :) But dammit, just when I thought I could take a short break, the work starts piling on again. I've finally cleared papers, assignments, and even am up-to-date with the readings, but have two short assignments due next week, one major one the week after, plus Euro studies research to do. *weakly shields self* And I'm completely clueless about the philosophy one this time around. (Argh! No, this wasn't what I signed up for! Where's the beer? The weed? Frat and sorority parties every alternate day? What do you mean this isn't Hollywood? Can I get a refund?")

Oh yes, is it okay if I respond on Wednesday? I think it's more effective face-to-face.